A few years ago, I witnessed my dad battle the Christmas lights through an entire Saturday and my mom throw in unwanted suggestions on the driveway. He swore an oath I dare not repeat, slammed a strand onto the driveway until it snapped, and finally gave up by dinner. The house looked like a Charlie Brown production. Find it here Installing Christmas lights should not be like a punishment and yet people still turn it into chaos every December and make it an experience that makes or breaks marriages and patience.
People who hire Christmas light professionals cost between $250 and 3,000 depending on the size of your house and how dramatic you want the display to be. They'll design the whole setup, carry commercial quality equipment on ladders that you would never put your trust in and make your property look like it belongs on a holiday postcard. Most crews are through in a few hours what it would take you a whole weekend--unless you manage to fall apart emotionally first. After the holidays they come back and take everything down, so you do not have to have the embarrassing February talk with neighbors about why you still have your lights up. Schedule early in the fall or you will have very few options left.
DIY Christmas lighting requires more than holiday spirit. Begin by taking proper measurements of all the rooflines, windows, and doorways that you will be illuminating. Get about twenty percent more lights than you think you need--holiday decorating has a way of exposing bad math. Get the right clips that fit your surface, be it shingles, gutters or brick. The generic clips break miserably, and most of the time it is the initial windstorm that causes your carefully arranged masterpiece to fly into the bushes at 2 AM.
LED lights cost more upfront but are the only viable option at the moment. They consume power very efficiently and incandescents gulp power like your uncle at the open bar. LEDs are also far longer lasting and remain cool to the touch, which is important when you need to drape them on trees that are alive or flammable decorations. The quality of colors has been enhanced significantly. LEDs are as warm as old-school bulbs without the risk of fire and electric bill shock.
Safety is not sexy but it will not kill you. Always check the strands and then walk up. Always use outdoor rated extension cords, and never indoor. Stay connected at high level and dry. Never overload circuits--calculate amperage of your breaker and perform calculations. The location of the ladders is important: firm ground, the right angle, a person observing you. Shouting watch yourself by your spouse does not count as proper spotting.